"Dolphin" / Prince / The Gold Experience

This one's funny. I'm a huge Prince fan (actually, this album was in the "Artist Formally Known As.." stage in 1995), but let's be honest in that his best days are behind him (as a writer, not a performer).

This one's unintentionally hilarious. I like The Gold Album, actually, it's got some great songs on it :"Pussy Control", "Endorphinemachine", "The Most Beautiful Girl in the World", "Gold", and "Shhh" (which blew me away in concert when he played it - talk about a freakin' deep cut) but this one's pretty bad. It's got the same theme as the classic "If I Was Your Girlfriend", but on crack.

I'm including the lyrics here just for a laugh. God bless Prince with the 2s, Us and whatnot.

How beautiful do the words have 2 be
Before they conquer every heart?
How will U know if I'm even in the right key
If U make me stop before I start?
CHORUS:
If I came back as a dolphin
Would U listen 2 me then?
Would U let me be your friend?
Would U let me in?
U can cut off all my fins
But 2 your ways I will not bend
I'll die before I let U tell me how 2 swim
And I'll come back again as a dolphin

Why does my brother have 2 go hungry
When U told him there was food 4 all?
This is the man that stands next 2 the man
That stands 2 catch U when U fall (Oh!)

If I'm under water, will U find me? (Find me {x4})
Will U shine a light and try 2 guide me?
It's happened before, I've knocked on your door
But U wouldn't let me in

How beautiful do the words have 2 be
Before they conquer every heart? (Oh!)

If I came back as a dolphin
Would U listen 2 me then?
Would U let me be your friend?
Would U let me in?
U can cut off all my fins
But 2 your ways I will not bend
I'll die before I let U tell me how 2 swim
Come back in the end as a dolphin (Oh)
(I'll come back, baby)
(Let me in, let me in) As a dolphin
(Be my friend) Dolphin
(Yeah, yeah)

Dolphin
As a dolphin
As a dolphin
As a dolphin


Seriously, man, that's gold, I tell you. Gold.

It's like the worst 9th grade poetry I see set to music.

And, speaking of music, it's not actually too bad. I like the little break right after the chorus with the neat little bass riff (check 1:03 to 1:15 for the first instance), but I just can't get past the lyrics. Help yoursleves, though:

http://www.mediafire.com/?9sjjorfg2uj